We Struck Again

I went out into the dark, somber streets again last night, Venegance in tow... no, it's the other way around. Kind of scary when you think about it. I'm just an exoskeleton for the thing. It seems to feel sympathy to me, but how do I know? It might be excellent at faking emotions, considering It's not even human...

Anyways, It led me down to the parking lot of a closed supermarket. The curfew's fairly lenient, even after what happened, and wasn't set in motion until midnight, so getting there wasn't the problem. Outside there were three of the bullies

(gaybashing insolent wormfucks)

and We went to them slowly and grabbed one of the three from behind and tossed him across the parking lot. He hit his car and slid down as the horn started blaring. His face was bloodied from the impact and there was a dent in the fender. Now I picked up the other two and- even though I did try and fail to fight against It- We walked off with one in either hand, kicking and asking to be let go.

(pathetic shitstormers we taught them a lesson)

I was forced to keep my eyes open for the next part. I wasn't allowed to look away or close my eyes or make an apology, but I don't think they'd believe me if I apologized to them as I broke their arms and then hamstrung them with my father's kitchen knife. They writhed on the floor, and I had to look down. I couldn't get the screams out of my head. They wailed and wailed

(and it was orgasmic)

and I could do nothing but scream and scream in my own mind as I watched my arms tear open one of their stomachs. He screamed higher, peaking at a high soprano, roughly being choked off as he was strangled by his own intestines. I don't know how It let the poor man stay alive long enough to gut him like a fish, but it did, and I have to replay the feelings of suffering and agony on the man's face. He released his bowels and bladder and he spat out blood in his final death rattle.

Then We took the other one's head in both hands and pulled, hearing the scream reach even higher levels than the first as his vocal chords stretched long after his spine and neck went, finally snapping as well as the two thin, pouring strands that were his corrotid and jugular.

We left covered in blood, through the streets. I wanted to run in front of a car and kill myself then, or get myself turned in and executed, or get caught. But It wouldn't let Us. It continued as it had, expertly ducking into alleys and other nooks and crannies when people passed. We sneaked back with my parents none the wiser. We took a shower, and It replayed the scene in my mind over and over again in my dreams as It slumbered off.

I couldn't sleep.

I hadn't. For days.

Cops found the body. Those two poor kids, and the kid I threw against a car was in a coma and on life support.

I didn't mean to do this. Goddammit, what is it going to do next?

you'll see my little lamb now come to the flocks and I will reward you

Blood Everywhere

As soon as I finished typing that last sentence, blood started trickling down my nose and mouth. I quickly made the post, I guess my fingers stamped too hard on the keyboard beforehand, and I just pressed the Publish button before blood started coming out of my nose in larger amounts. I tasted the viscous, coppery taste of blood and I choked it up in a frenzy of deep scarlet and phlegm. My eyes started hazing read and my hearing clogged with a loud trickling noise and I writhed on the ground. There are still stains on the floor. My nose is still bleeding just a little. I have to clean everything up before my parents find out about all the blood. They'll have a heart attac

...what?
No- no- I got your message.
I did ask for your help, didn't I?
Just this one more time.
No. No I won't like it and I won't come hand and knee begging for more.
How is the ecstacy!?
I'm not going to be drugged and carried along-
...not drugged... endorphins.
You are in my head aren't you.

now you're listening, poor little lamb
now come
let me put an end to your bullies

My Condolences

My condolences to the family of Joey Thane.

My condolences to his sister, his father and mother, and mostly to him.

For everything I've done.

I threw him into a garden of rose bushes face-first. It's not exactly a field of nettles like in Rapunzel, but Thane accidentally scratched his corneas open on them. He came to school with a strap of bloodies gauze around his face this morning. He didn't say a word. Not to anyone. Nobody suspected. I think he was too afraid of me. And he couldn't see.

I tried talking to someone he knew about how long it would be before his eyes recovered. One of the less bigoted said about two weeks to a year, if at all. It cut pretty deep into his eyes, and they may have been scratched beyond repair. He also suffered lacerations of the face and arms and a concussion.

God, I feel horrible. I don't want to do it again
no
not you
not again
we didn't make this kind of promise
get the fuck out of my head
you aren't in my head!

...you are.
I see...
I still refuse to submit.
Leave me alone and get the fuck away from mafsdjk

It Took Control

It took control and the instinct hit me like a shot. Pleasure rolled up my entire body and I couldn't move my own muscles. It was pure ecstacy. Then I saw myself rising up from the bed, my feet moving against the will of my mind. But I didn't care. I was addicted to whatever the Bloody Venegance was selling.

I walked out into the sidewalk, never missing a beat, never faltering. My head was held high and my eyes were open and I felt like I could finally make the difference.

I found Joey Thane at his house. He was the one who threw the rock into my eye. He was the one who started jeering at me the earliest. He was the one I tried giving my heart and soul to, and he crushed it with one heel and beat me with his fists. He was all about sex. He was a prime example of the sick, disgusting members of this new generation. The swagulas, I used to call them. He gossipped and he talked big and he acted like he was the king in this small Southern town.

It was time he got venegance.

I knocked on the door... It knocked on the door, and Joey Thane answered.

He started to say something obscene, but It made me grab Joey by the collar and lift him into the air. I still wasn't feeling anything. I didn't say anything. We just stood there for a second or two, my eyes staring triumphantly up at his. Then I punched him.

Again and again I kept punching him. Now that the Venegance seems to be dormant, I feel so guilty about it. I stooped to his bullying level. No... It made me do it... but it was something I always wanted to do so I shouldn't make foolish excuses. I kept beating and he started whimpering for me to stop. I almost did... but It was too strong. I threw him into a nearby garden bush face-first. He started screaming and I didn't know why. I stood there for a minute. He was stuck there, screaming his head off, lying on the bush. Then he rolled over and clutched his face.

I don't know what happened. Maybe he cracked.

But I need some sleep.

I felt so high then.

But bringing back up what I did to Thane...

I regret it.

I Met a New Friend

I don't know Its true name. It won't give me Its true name. Understandable. I also can't pinpoint a gender to it. I don't care much about what gender It is, or whether or not It has one at all. If anything, I'm glad It prefers to be called It. It keeps the bias of sex out of it. It keeps the idea of gender roles, alignments and biases. It's more caring than my mother. It's more thoughtful than my father. It needs no gender because It is too benevolent to consider itself either.

It explained to me that It felt my pain. It heard my blood cry out to It and so It came to help me. It calls Itself the Bloody Venegance. It says I can finally get back the dignity and the pride in myself I lost almost half a year ago. I no longer have to suffer from the pain. Or the dejection. Or the discrimination of my peers.

But It tells me that my access to its strength requires self-sacrifice. It asks me if I can handle giving a piece of myself away. ...I said yes. I don't know how long it took me, but I said yes. And you know what?

I feel free. I finally feel free. I have It by my side. I feel whole again.

Improvements to the Body

I don't know what happened with that strange blood, but I told you how rejuvinated I feel. Not only that, but my parents saw the notable improvement. The bullet wound still stings like hell, but all the other minor injuries have pretty much completely healed. It's a medical miracle, I heard one of the two doctors say.

I can't help but agree. I just realised something that was bugging me when the doctors decided to send me through a full physical exam. I can see out of my right eye again. It's not just a blur anymore. I haven't seen this clearly in five months.

Other things I have noticed-

I have more acute hearing. I was told to lift as heavy a weight as I could and I could lift 30 lbs even though only a week ago I could scarcely lift 18 lbs at best. I can run fast, though I do it with a limp because of the bullet wound. However, the doctors tried performing a blood test on me. Every time, it hit muscle instead, and every time a sharp pain flew up my arm and into my brain and it was like a bulldozer crushing my brain every single ti

who's that?
Who's there?
What do you want?
What is your name?
Bloody Venegance. I like that name. Where are you? I can't see you.

I Feel Better

I was out cold for three days. I did not dream, and I could barely think. I was just a singular being floating in the edge of darkness. And then, the darkness gave way to a blinding white. The white was so pure that it seared my eyes. No- white was not the way to describe it. It wasn't just a pure shade of white. It was clear. Somehow, I could tell that beyond that square of clearness that nothing existed and nothing inhabited and never would.

I tried struggling away from it, fearing the end. I didn't want to die. I'm too human to not care about death. It terrifies me, and the blankness in that square scared me more than anything. Then deep rouge lines appeared in the darkness, surrounding the square like varicose veins. They covered the square, filled it, and then filled the rest of the inky darkness.

Then I woke up.

The doctors say I was out for three days. The blood of the donor was peculiar and my body weakened into a comatose state to accept the new blood. My blood type is O-, the universal donor. However, the donor's was a strange state. They couldn't quite tell what it was, but they said that it was close enough to O-. At least, that's what they said.

I feel good to be alive. It feels good to get out there now. I feel rejuvinated. I feel alive. I'm supposed to go to muscular therapy. Apparently muscle in my shoulder was blown clean off. But... it's like the incident never happened. It's so strange.

But no reason to be suspicious of a blessing, is there?

In any case, I have to go home. I have a month of schoolwork left, and I'll turn it all in, whether they grade it or not.